An Open Letter to the Georgia Board of Pardon & Parollee in Memorandum of Troy Davis

Dear GA Board of Pardon & Parolee Members:

Moments ago, I came across a disturbing report via Reuters. Given that the media is prone to reporting untruths I pray that it is indeed just that…untrue. On September 21, 2011 at 11:08 P.M., you allowed the murder of Troy Davis even though the evidence proving his guilt was no longer credible. Today, I happened to read an article from 2008  that in my opinion showcased just why the hypocrisy of your board as well as the justice system in this country. It was written that  in 2008, after his lawyer conveyed his remorse and blamed his action on the usage of an illegal substance you determined that Samuel David Crowe  should no longer receive the death penalty. You failed to apply the personal responsibility clause to Samuel’s case. He personally chose to use drugs knowing the mental status changes that would result yet he knowingly used them , therefore he is responsible.

There is no need for me to go into why it was your moral and civic duty to grant Troy a pardon. By now you should have heard it all. As a matter of fact, I am sure that you have heard it all yet, you didn’t think twice about committing that man to death. My question is, why? Why did you feel that it was okay to condemn a man to death even after the evidence against him fell apart? Why did you not do an investigation on your own to determine whether Troy really was guilty or if those who 20 years ago testified against him were credible? How is it that you granted clemency to a man who pleaded guilty yet blamed his action on his voluntary usage of a controlled substance? These are only just some of the “why” questions that filter through my mind. I am sure that I will never understand.

I commend Troy Davis for thinking about your souls even while he was set to be killed. It is clear to me that God was far from present in your lives as you made this decision. If  He were, I am confident that you would have had made a more appropriate decision. Worry not though, your callous actions has sparked a nations outrage. As a nation, we are slowly not fast enough becoming tired of the system that is supposed to work for us taking advantage of their authority and ignoring what the masses want. You represent what is wrong with this country on so many levels. We are always quick to judge the practices of other nations as barbaric and inhumane yet this nation has exhibited some of the most barbaric practices since its inception. The lack of conscious that was displayed when it was decided to ignore the evidence regardless of how right or wrong it may have been proves the fact that this country was founded on evil and continues to operate on evil principles. From the moment this country’s forefathers landed on Plymouth rock plymouth rock landed on them they set the stage for the evil that takes place today. They destroyed the nation that existed and was thriving only to throw them little pieces of gratuitous tokens today.  They carted human beings from one country to another to use and abuse them. Stealing them from their native land, tongue and religion and audaciously invoking God’s name as its sanctioner. It is times like this when my pride in my country is diminished and I wonder how it would have been if the Native Americans from long ago had sent those lost individuals trying to start anew away from the overbearing Monarchy of England away from their shores? I wonder what would have happened if those Africans whose ancestral blood runs deep in my vein would have declined to trade with them and insisted that they leave their shores?

Know that God sits on his throne and watches us all. At the end of the day, He is the final judge, juror and executioner. There will come a time when we all have to stand before Him and be judged. We shall be judged on so many levels and found guilty on those same levels. There will be no pardon boards or questions of guilt or innocence because He will show the truth. Many people think that they shall only be judged on acts committed in their personal lives as opposed to their professional ones. I am confident in saying God forgive me if I am wrong that there will be no separation. As a servant of God we all have a responsibility to do right at all times. There is no separation. A wrong act is just that…wrong. Judge Mathias said it best, “This was without a doubt a Great miscarriage of justice.”  It was criminal that Troy was put to death and yes Georgia you do have blood on your hands. Know that no matter how many times you try to rinse it away, the stain will be forever present. You will have to live with your crimes and answer for it when we all go before our Maker.

Like Troy said  with his last breath, “May God have mercy on your souls. May God bless your souls.” Even at last moments among the living Troy had God in his mind and on his tongue. I wonder if he exist for you.



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The saga of 31

31 years ago, my mother gave birth to her first child. That child was me. For 31 years, my mother has been the sole parent to take care of my needs mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually, etc. For 31 years, I have lacked all of the above from the man who participated in the act of creating me. Now some may feel that I am out-of-pocket for speaking the truth and nothing but the truth but hey, it’s my birthday, and I don’t feel the need to hold anything back.

For 31 years, I have listened to the excuses, the lies, the stories, the promises, the reason, the comments, etc. And for 31 years nothing has changed. he is still the man that he was even when he was in the house…an absent man. Some may think, that I am bitter. The truth of the matter is that, it has taken me 31 years to officially say, “Sire, go with God.” Some may want to play the, he is your father card but that man is not my father. You see a father involves more than ejaculating some sperm into a receptacle also known as a vagina. It involves, loving, caring, bonding, providing, etc. I can’t be expected to acknowledge someone who did none of the above…not even the bare minimum. While there may be some who choose to give him his just due on the basis that it was his sperm that helped to get them here I choose not to give him that blind allegiance. While, I will never blatantly disrespect him I can not and do not respect him for he is a man who failed for 31 years to take care of h is responsibilities…namely me.  I am a fatherless child.

In my 31 years, the ones who showed me the things that I needed to know in this life were my mother. I am all that she is. With the mercy of God, her sacrifices are the reason why 31 years I am the woman who I am today. I also must thank the surrogate fathers who came at different points of my life and taught me all that my Sire didn’t teach me. If it weren’t for them I would not understand the ways of men.

While, I don’t know the future, I am sure that in the years to come, I will be saying 32…33….34…so on and so forth. I have learned not to expect anything and that way I won’t be disappointed.

On a happier note, HAPPY 31st BIRTHDAY to me. I am SO BLESSED and I give thanks to God for allowing me to be the woman who I am today at 31.



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The Donald Trump Circus

If you have been paying attention to the news, you have had the opportunity to either hear or read about the circus of fools that Donald Trump is currently presiding over. If you are like me well then you are just as disgusted, insulted and pissed about it. You may disagree that President Obama is capable of leading America the Beautiful and that is fine. However, Donald Trump’s circus goes beyond that sentiment. He has insulted not only President Obama but also you and me. Here is a man who literally born with the proverbial silver spoon in his mouth and believes that rightly so only he is entitled to the best that life has to offer. How arrogant of him.

If I were naive, I would say that his sentiment is just his sentiment. The reality of it all is that, it is a sentiment that many Americans have. It is a sentiment that we a people who were brought forcefully to this country starting in 1619 and made to toll the lands that were not ours deserve nothing. It is a sentiment that has corralled the Native Americans like sheep onto reservations starting on January 31, 1876. It is the sentiment that perpetuates, a cycle of imprisonment filling this nation’s jail full of minorities. This sentiment is why we as a nation spend more money on the prison system then education and why as a first world country our educational system belongs in the sewers and the amount of uneducated individuals most of them being minorities are beyond high. Donald Trump is not the only one who believes in the ideology that a “Black” boy who came from nothing should continue to be nothing. Donald trump is echoing the words that pass through the many bigoted, racially driven Americans on a daily basis. Donald Trump had the balls to say it and for that, I do not fault him.

We as a Black people have become lazy and have a false sense of security. Yes, “legal” slavery is over. The physical act of slavery in America the Beautiful no longer exist (we know this to be technically untrue), however; many of us continue to be mentally enslaved. The truth is that there are many who would see us defeated. They could care less if we sit in a cell like pigs awaiting slaughter. They could care less if we remain uneducated. They could careless period. We continue to give them food for fodder and engage in acts that perpetuate the belief that we are in fact second-class citizens. We continuously kill our own self, disrespect ourselves, cheat ourselves, remain uneducated, etc. and yet we expect to be treated with the same dignity afforded our counterparts. Why should they when we do not dignify ourselves. It is not enough to say that the blood shed to make this country what it is was that of our ancestors. No we must do more. We should be doing more. Doing more involves the handful of people who are doing. It involves the masses doing more. It involves numbers in great force. It involves the likes of those who did sit-in at Woolworth and went on freedom rides. It involves those who stood up and declared that they were more than what society was trying to classify them as. It involves so much and we all have to do our part.

We have to stop allowing ourselves to be disrespected and mistreated. We have perpetuated a system where we are taken for granted. In spite of the disrespect that is thrown our way, we continue to support the wrongdoers. In the end, Donald Trump knows that in spite of whatever he says no matter how insidious it may be we, as a people will endeavor to spend our dollars on his products. We will gamble in his casinos, spray his colon on our bodies, and happily like a pig in slop wear his clothes. Why do we continuously support those who care nothing about us? When we support Donald and other like-minded individuals we are consistently, telling them either that we agree and accept it or that we are just too dumb to comprehend what it is that they are saying. We must STAND up for our RIGHTS. While we did not ask to be brought to this country the fact remains that we are here and stay here we shall. We must DEMAND that we are treated more than a second-class citizen for it is the blood of our ancestors that made what is considered America the Beautiful possible. We must not support those who have the unmitigated gall to speak out of their mouths disparaging comments that insult our ancestors and their struggles so that we could walk thing land “Free.” We must remember that our ancestors in Africa were KINGS and QUEENS. We must remember that because of US this nation has grown and flourished in the manner that it has. Not only must we remember all this and more. We must BELIEVE that it is true and act accordingly. In the end, we must do BETTER. Better than what we are now doing.


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Hiatus Not

I wish that I could say that my unexpected hiatus from this blog was because I was off getting rich. One day but not today. My hiatus involved some serious family issues and a subsequent death. I am just now getting myself together. In the coming weeks as I prepare to graduate and start another chapter in my life. Stay tuned for those stories and more.



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The road to hell is paved with good intentions

For some reason or another even the most vilest of us all sets out to good. Some of us do more good than others and others do none at all. It is all about the scales of balance. The haves and the have-nots. There is nothing wrong with doing good. As a matter of fact one should always strive to do good. Afterall it is our good deeds that will help carry us  into heaven. Life is funny though, when you least expect it a curve ball is thrown at you and what the thought was actually right could turn out to be some wrong. What you thought was so good may actually lead to hell. Now when I say hell I am not necessarily speaking literally. Rather the figuratively can apply. Depending on how you look at it hell can be a broken relationship, a guilty feeling or simply the outcome is not as all as you had expected…lacking pleasantry. I am sure that at some point we have all been there where we actually meant well however; it didn’t go right. If you haven’t that lucky you… you must be a saint. I for one am not and have been there done that and back again.

If there is one thing that I have learned in my journey of growth is that sometime what you think may be right might actually be wrong. Sometimes the well-meaning word may actually be un-needed. The caring gesture may actually be an insult. The shoulder to lean on may actually be a roadblock. What you think may actually be inconsequential. Not to long ago, I went to go help an old woman get  off the bus with her shopping cart. She became very snippy and declined my help. After seeing how baffled I was and a taken aback she explained. It wasn’t that she didn’t appreciate my help rather that shopping cart was grounding her as she walked down and she was afraid that if I helped her she would trip and fall. Here in mind, I thought that I was doing something good however had I carried it out in her eyes it would have been very wrong.

As hard as it may be, sometimes we have to stand back and wait until we are asked for help. It may be that they really do need help but the question should be will they welcome the help and how our you delivering said help. At the end of the day we are ultimately all responsible for ourselves and sometimes we have to step back and worry about ourselves and not others.



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Afterthoughts of a Valentine’s Day

Just in case you missed the memo, yesterday was Valentine’s Day. You know the day that society has commercialized when in fact it is a real holiday sanctioned by then Pope Gelasius sometime around 498 A.D. While no one really knows the significance of the holiday, it is assumed heavily that it all has to do with love. The assumption might just be right but really who cares. This morning, I happened to be reading my home girl’s blog post For All The Anti-Valentine’s… | Carrie Pink. Her post along with the twitter conversation touched a chord in me and it goes a little something like this.

Personally, I don’t hate nor love Valentine’s Day. I don’t sit around waiting for someone to buy me flowers or wondering whether I’ll be knocking the boots later on. I can buy my own flowers and knocking the boots should be a regular occurrence. I mean after all I am a red blooded woman in her thirties. I have had the fortune of being with individuals who choose not to get into the hype of Valentine’s Day and quite frankly I am fine with that. Quite honestly, it saves me money for more important things shoes, clothes and vacation namely me. Being a sentimental being even when I was dealing with someone who savored Valentine’s Day a Happy Valentine’s day sufficed. After all I gain pleasure from pleasure. While I understand that is me and obviously there is no one else like me I stand firm in my belief that the disenchanted belief surrounding Valentine’s Day are unnecessary. For me I believe Valentine’s day is all about love, passion, romance, intimacy, etc. It is so much more than flowers, chocolate, lingerie, and good ole sex. Valentine’s Day is a marker in the world set to remind us how beautiful love really is and can be. It is not a cause for strife or jealousy. As Carrie stated in her post, “I didn’t celebrate Valentine’s day in its traditional sense, it’s the day I lost the MOST important person in my life, after an accident that we were both a part of.. My grandmother.. I mourned her death for 10 Valentine’s Days…” While Valentine’s Day was for a time, her period of mourning even she rose to the occasion and eventually re-acknowledged the beauty of Valentine’s Day.

If Valentines’ Day really meant something to you then it would not matter whether you were single or attached. You would be caught up in the moment sucking up all of the love in the air. Rather like everything else, it has become this commercialized day where everyone spends their money on useless items that can be brought any day of the year. People stand in endless lines ready to but a gift rather than being sentimental and making a gift. Don’t get me wrong, I like gifts. No I LOVE gifts but you can give me a gift any day of the year. While I understand that misery loves company this is where I have to part ways. I can’t wallow in your grief because you believe that you have failed to capture what you believe is the essence of Valentine’s Day…a partner. How about you partner with yourself and maybe then what you believe you need so desperately to enjoy the essence of this day will appear like magic right before you. Until then keep your pity party to yourself because I have my own problems least of all who will be my Valentine’s.

I hope your Valentine’s Day was blessed. I know mine was. After all I was given the breath of life. What better gift is there than that?




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Maintaing the Muslim and Finding a Husband

Rep. Anthony Weiner and Huma Abedin

For those of you who do not know, my alter ego is Muslim. Yeah I admit, I am not the best Muslim but who really is the best person. I pray every day asking God to keep me on the straight path and hope that he forgives my sins and grants me paradise. Bottom line…I too sin. Anyway, this is not confession not that Muslims do that and I am not going to bore you with my sinning saga. I read an interesting article this morning and realized that I just had to blog about it.

Because I am a sophisticated womanboogie, I read my dose of NY Times via my mobile phone. An article titled “Some Muslims Use Speed Dating to Spur Marriage –” caught my eye. Before I go into the quandary that I have with this article and the difficulties that I find myself in let me divulge a true story. On April 25, 2005, I was heading back to NYC after having just buried my grandmother from upstate NY. Having my hair covered, it was obvious that I was Muslim. Go figure, I should have been incognito. As luck would have itbeing sarcastic , a fellow bus mate was also Muslim. Even luckier was I that he was a male. I guess you are wondering why I do not sound too happy. It is quite simple…he was jailbait. I mean he had literally just gotten out of jail. I mean literally, as if they gave him bus money to go back to his hood. Only knowing my first name and the fact that I was Muslim in his mind I was a prime candidate to make his wife and was all set to speak with my brother regarding my hand in marriage. Let me just say that clearly it was a no bueno moment and I quickly proceeded to get on the phone and ignore him the remainder of the ride. There was no way that I was marrying him.

This is what I am faced with on a daily basis when I encounter some Muslim men. Sometimes, I look like a regular person hair not covered you would be amazed at the propositions that I get and when I tell them I am Muslim boy do I get another story. All of a sudden, I am the Delilah and going straight to hell. Nevertheless, I digress. For those of you who do not know in all technicalities Muslim women are supposed to marry Muslim men. If you ask me why, all I can say is because God said so. You may have your own opinion and that is fine. Frankly, it is what it is. The only question is how a Muslim woman handles getting married with these odds. If I am honest with myself, I have come to accept that one of two things will be happening. Either I will not be getting married or my husband will not be Muslim.

Tough words to say from someone who is a part of one of the fastest growing religions way of life but facts are facts.  Maybe deep down, I do not want to marry a Muslim man. However, I do not think that is the reason for my reluctance. It is more like the fact that I have unfortunately seen better characters men who happen to be non-Muslim. Do not get me wrong. I have come face to face with face to face with definitely some very positive Muslim brothers. The problem is that they either are to old or married already I don’t share men and therefore ineligible. The ones who do not fall into this character that have I encountered me are just lame and a bit overzealous. I am all for being spiritual but seriously, when you are over zealousness may threaten my freedom I will have to pass. They either know too little about the faith or think they know everything and are as clueless as an infant is at birth. Sorry to say but many of the African-American ones live for the moment and their get rich schemes. Sorry buddy but unless you are related to Channel selling incense will not make you rich and I am not corner hopping with you. Let’s not even speak on the fact that some of them hear that it is lawful to have more than one wife and decide to run with it puffing their chest out as if the amount of women they can marry attributes to their manhood. Sorry but it does not.

So coming full circle, why do I have issues with this article? Pure and simple, it is madness. The whole purpose of speed dating is spontaneity and a little bit of fun. You are not looking for a marriage proposal rather you are looking for an opportunity to get to know someone and maybe that will turn into a proposal. Let us be honest, the individuals in this article are beyond thirsty. They are willing to marry their daughter off for the sake of marrying her off and are content in the fact that they are Muslim and working. Yes, some of them questioned whether the potential mate would allow their daughter/sister the freedom of their career but let us be real, they really could care less. After all their goal is to see, their daughter married preferably to some with the same culture as them. Truthfully, it has more to do with the cultural aspect than the religious aspect. They can say otherwise but it is quite clear to me.

After hearing, a childhood friend’s experience with a similar set-up there is not a snowball chance of me ever going to an event such as this where Muslims are proclaiming to have a different route to finding a mate. I will definitely pass on this opportunity. If that is the only way that I will find me a Muslim husband roll out the red carpet and accept that I won’t be marrying a Muslim man. Like I said chances are, I will not anyway and I am cool with thatkanye shrug to those who are not. While my mother never fails to remind me of my obligation, the bottom line is that I do want to get married one day. I understand the concept of sins and sinning but as a Muslim there is only one classified sin that is not forgiven and that is not it. Nor do I agree with the ideology that if he loves you he will become Muslim. Being responsible for my own actions is tough enough. I do not want someone to love me that much that they go against what they may believe in. Quite honestly, I would be insulted and was insulted when it happened in the past. My goal for a husband is quite simple, you must be spiritual, you must respect my spirituality, you must be gainfully employed no corner hopping of any sort, you must be respectful, you must at least have a high school diploma intelligence is not measured by a college degree, you must want children and agree that our children will be raised as Muslim don’t worry I fight against being hypocritical so if I’m not doing it they won’t either but they will understand that they should be doing it, and last but not least we must be in love. Everything else can be worked out as we go along. Muslim or not if you do not meet this criteria you can kick rocks. It is all about your heart and unfortunately being Muslim does not make you pure in heart so why limit myself.

On that note HAPPY VALENTINE’s DAY! Here is to the lover in you!



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