Afterthoughts of a Valentine’s Day

Just in case you missed the memo, yesterday was Valentine’s Day. You know the day that society has commercialized when in fact it is a real holiday sanctioned by then Pope Gelasius sometime around 498 A.D. While no one really knows the significance of the holiday, it is assumed heavily that it all has to do with love. The assumption might just be right but really who cares. This morning, I happened to be reading my home girl’s blog post For All The Anti-Valentine’s… | Carrie Pink. Her post along with the twitter conversation touched a chord in me and it goes a little something like this.

Personally, I don’t hate nor love Valentine’s Day. I don’t sit around waiting for someone to buy me flowers or wondering whether I’ll be knocking the boots later on. I can buy my own flowers and knocking the boots should be a regular occurrence. I mean after all I am a red blooded woman in her thirties. I have had the fortune of being with individuals who choose not to get into the hype of Valentine’s Day and quite frankly I am fine with that. Quite honestly, it saves me money for more important things shoes, clothes and vacation namely me. Being a sentimental being even when I was dealing with someone who savored Valentine’s Day a Happy Valentine’s day sufficed. After all I gain pleasure from pleasure. While I understand that is me and obviously there is no one else like me I stand firm in my belief that the disenchanted belief surrounding Valentine’s Day are unnecessary. For me I believe Valentine’s day is all about love, passion, romance, intimacy, etc. It is so much more than flowers, chocolate, lingerie, and good ole sex. Valentine’s Day is a marker in the world set to remind us how beautiful love really is and can be. It is not a cause for strife or jealousy. As Carrie stated in her post, “I didn’t celebrate Valentine’s day in its traditional sense, it’s the day I lost the MOST important person in my life, after an accident that we were both a part of.. My grandmother.. I mourned her death for 10 Valentine’s Days…” While Valentine’s Day was for a time, her period of mourning even she rose to the occasion and eventually re-acknowledged the beauty of Valentine’s Day.

If Valentines’ Day really meant something to you then it would not matter whether you were single or attached. You would be caught up in the moment sucking up all of the love in the air. Rather like everything else, it has become this commercialized day where everyone spends their money on useless items that can be brought any day of the year. People stand in endless lines ready to but a gift rather than being sentimental and making a gift. Don’t get me wrong, I like gifts. No I LOVE gifts but you can give me a gift any day of the year. While I understand that misery loves company this is where I have to part ways. I can’t wallow in your grief because you believe that you have failed to capture what you believe is the essence of Valentine’s Day…a partner. How about you partner with yourself and maybe then what you believe you need so desperately to enjoy the essence of this day will appear like magic right before you. Until then keep your pity party to yourself because I have my own problems least of all who will be my Valentine’s.

I hope your Valentine’s Day was blessed. I know mine was. After all I was given the breath of life. What better gift is there than that?





About Divine*Pearlz

As one of my good friends, Carrie Pink (from says, I am a modern day superwoman. In the midst of me being a superwoman I am really down to earth once you get to know me. I love life and try to always live it to the fullest. I love God and try to always honor Him. I am service oriented after all I am a Finer Woman. I love health and have made it my mission in life to pursue degrees that will put me in a position to fight for better health policies for my people. All in all, I'm just me. You can take it or leave it!
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2 Responses to Afterthoughts of a Valentine’s Day

  1. mu-tor k. flood says:

    I have read alot on European holidays like Valentine’s day. I personally don’t believe they are good for the spirit and psyche of black youth and adults home or abroad. And so no longer celebrate them. Holidays like christmas, new years, halloween, valentine’s day,independence, memorial and veterans day, and the hardest one for me to give up was thanksgiving cause i love eating but i did for my higher self.

    • Divine says:

      I consider Thanksgiiving to be a family holiday. Although, that is not the whole idea behind the holiday sometimes you have to roll with the punches. The truth of the matter is this is a day when society as a whole will not begrudge you from spending time with your family. Aside from that it is the one day that I really eat like a fatted calf. Smacking my lips thinking about this year’s feast already.

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